Beautiful Dreamer

            

It's been one of those aggravating days, and I'm beginning to wonder just why I'm so fussed about it.  Me, fuss...lol...yes, I vent but I'm really so out of sorts about so many things which are really aggravations but nothing major.  (The tag at the top is snaggable, if you want, as always.)

I just had a zillion things to get done today plus I have Embarq coming Saturday to replace my phone lines in my house and install a splitter.  My new modem arrived yesterday and was far worse than the old one.  Embarq was able to pinpoint exactly which jacks are malfunctioning; one of them my PC is connected to.  Why, in God's name, the guy in March didn't care to address that or even acknowledge it, who knows.  Probably wanted to get home.  Anyway, I've had over 13,000 disconnections since Jan. when it was installed.  It was running well all summer but started acting up again a month ago.  For some reason, today hasn't been awful DSL wise.

Anyway, my house has gotten so messy since the Dish was installed.  I simply cannot bear someone entering this house when it looks like this.  I knew I would never get everything I needed to get done on Friday evening because I would be whooped so once again I used another vacation day.  I always feel so guilty but I don't take vacations.  Today was just an example of  my "vacations."

My bathtub is clogged.  The plunger queen gives up.  I had to buy some enzyme crap because I have a fiberglass bath fitter, and Drano would eat it away.  Lord, how do I function without my Drano...lol?  The local hardware store guy doesn't think the enzymes will eat through hair which is what is clogging the drain.  What to do?  I could always call my handy dandy plumber, Randy, which I might do because he will give me suggestions and pay a visit as a last resort.

I spent a couple of hours on the phone fussing with Blue Cross/Blue Shield, the doctor's office and lab because of being billed forlab tests that should have been coded differently plus fussing big time because Megan is still considered as "pediatric" under my Blue Cross plan because she is a dependent child. The AMA does not approve pap smears for pediatrics. Puhlease, she was kicked out of the pediatrician's office when she turned 18 and may be a child on my insurance but is an adult.  What a bunch of BS.  I got a bill for $474 yesterday for the gyne visit and lab tests.  Another hr on the phone with me getting totally out of control but in the end, it was an adjuster's error and payment was made. 

So, I'm feeling so fragile right now which I hate because I've gone through so much and am much stronger than this.  Dang, I miss my dad again.  My daddy could always makes things right.  I know I'm learning lessons in humility and being humble because my dad kind of spoiled me.  Today, I'm feeling like little Chrissy again who wants to go crying to daddy to fix everything.  I don't want to be grown up today and have to be responsible for so much.  I want to wave a magic wand and make my baby all better.  Actually, I lost it when I was talking to Blue Cross because how dare they deny my daughter the right to something which will save her life.  Much as I tried, I burst into tears.  I used to do that all the time during confrontations but it's been years.  I hate when I blubber. 

My brother's wife is supposed to call about Thanksgiving tonight.  That's a whole new entry which I don't want to think about right now.

I'm not pressing my luck.  I want to save this and try to get around and visit.  I fell asleep during Dancing with the Stars right after Mario and Emmitt's first dance...grrr.  I best stay awake tonight.

Thank you all for your prayers and listening to my sad sack entry.  I know I will rebound as always.

CHRIS