Friday, March 23, 2007

A long weekend

               

I actually hadn't planned on taking a vacation day today.  I scheduled next Wednesday off to take Grizzly for his liver function.  He started hobbling pretty badly again a couple of days ago so I made a vet's appt. for this morning along with the testing. Of course, the little rascal is moving quite well today and was last night also.  I dread the trip to the vet as Joey is working at the cemetery again so I have to drive the wild man by myself.  He doesn't exactly behave well in the car.  And he's definitely not getting in my new car.

Megan met me for lunch yesterday.  We went to a local place called Max & Erma's.  It's similar to Applebees, Chilis, etc.  Her business fraternity was sponsoring it.  20% of our bill is donated to charity.  I had a wonderful, layered grilled chicken salad.

Megan is doing quite well.  Her grades are definitely improving quite a bit, and she is towing the line.

I've mentioned my mother and I pretty frequently here.  We co-existed for the first 50 years of my life.  She trying to mold me into a clone of herself and myself balking and fighting every step of the way.  I've mentioned that about three years ago, the tide changed.  She mellowed, and I simply did not feel it was necessary to argue anymore with her about our differences.  She is going to be 88 this year.  I was daddy's girl.  My father died 3 months after their 50th anniversary.  It took my mother a few years to deal with this.  She simply chose not to deal at all with me then.  In fact, she was quite "biting" even more so during the ensuing years.

I called my mom hours after Megan's DUI.  I didn't want her to read about it in the local paper.  The shock would have done her in.  My mother is hugely rigid.  Well, she was....

She was hoping I would consult an attorney, which I did, but had absolutely no intention of petitioning her for one cent.  This is Megan's ballgame.  The shocker came the other day.  She told Joey she will pick up the legal fees because Megan will have enough in fines to pay for.  Megan started crying when I told her this yesterday and is insisting that she will pay every cent back to her grandma.  My mother is insisting she won't.

I realize now that even though for years I thought my mother didn't love me or at least not as much as my brother, I was mistaken.  She just couldn't express her feelings.  She was hard on me growing up.  Of course, I was a mouthy kid, even as an adult, because we share practically no views in common.  Now, it doesn't matter.  We still don't think even remotely alike but I no longer feel the need to argue my point.  LOL...somehow, I think this bothers my brother to no end.  He is slowly but surely losing his "status."  I truly believe that when the time comes for my mother to need someone to care for her, she will want me.

Anyway, yesterday was 70 and lovely.  It was good to see Megan.  She will be home soon for Easter break.  Can't believe how fast it's approaching.  We discussed the bedroom situation.  She is moving her furniture back for the summer.  Her single bed (a lovely sleigh bed) is going into my old bedroom.  Some of the furniture she bought this past summer will fit in my old room.  The double bed she has now will go into her room.  Back to my old bedroom I go although I don't have a DISH hooked up in there.

Grizzly is none to happy that he is fasting and cannot have a doggy treat...lol. 

TGIF and BIG HUGS

          

23 comments:

my78novata said...

ah hope grizzly gets al better. Pepper use to be bad dog in the car but suckers stopped that. lol
Im glad megan is diong well with this all. maybe hse can share this story with others. like maybe new drivers or soemthing or at a high school drivers course. and what happend in her past. she seems truely repentant. NOW about your mother. I have a strained mother daughter relationship. I really do not like arguing but my m om constanly raises her voice. you try to talk to her (shes driving my dad nutzo he has his own problems) and she just keeps raising her voice and yelling and over talking you. I think she resents that i took away her ''Career" and yet she doenst realize or put to task that daddy was leaving the marriage and worked it out becuase I was born. took 7 years to have me and he would not leave for anything. though now after 50 years......... she keeps saying she wants out. I do know its the beginning of alzhiemers but this has always been her. walking out the door at times. He cleans the house does his laundry she wont , he takes care of the yard and her car and pays all bills. She doesnt realize how lucky she is. A man that clean better than most maids. She watches tv daily or runs around town. Im an only child and its heart breakting looking at life like this with her. Yes she does have her soft side. but even that gets less and less. I wish I had what I see on tv with moms and daugthers. or with mine!!!!!!

springangel235 said...

I wish Grizzly well today...I know my animals hate  a fasting trip to the Vet.  It is hard...but for test, it is a must do.  Keep us posted on the outcome.  
That was so nice 20% of the bill goes to charity.  Sounded like an awesome meal you had...
Mom my has paid for so many things for my daughter....sounds like we have that issue in common.  I wish Megan well in paying the fines...
Spring is finally here for sure...I know it is so warm this morning...56...going to 70 today again...hope you have a lovely day Chris...and make the weekend the best...hugs and love,
Joyce

astoriasand said...

Hi Chris,Sorry to read Grizzly hasn't been too good again.Usualy the case though isn' it How we ourselves seem better when our Doc's appointments come around.Grrrrrrrr.As for your mom and the paying out for Megan.Well love I do understand I should want to help all I could for my Grandaughter.Many times my own daughter and I didin't see eye to eye like you and your mom.You are right in the fact you thought your MOM wanted you to be a clone of her.I think that was my problem with Jo my daughter.In fact I think many mums want this.In the end she did tell me I was right and that I had reason to be like I was with her when she was younger.Think it took for her to be a MOM herself to realise I was only trying to advise her not TELL her.She too was a  daddy's girl well  STEP Daddy as my partner brought her up from being one yr old.As he did my three boys when I met him.We just have one son together.We are best of friends now though and happy with one another.I just don't see her enough with the distance we live apart.Which I so miss.I am proud of your Megan offering to pay Grandma back every cent.Not many would even offer in todays generation.Hope you get all the rooms sorted and being all back nice and cosy together.Grizzly fasting,that reminds me I havn't had my Brecky yet I too am starving LOL.You take Care Have a lovely day if possible .Hope the vets appointment goes well.So good to hear from you again.
Take Care God Bless Astroriasand
http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

jlocorriere05 said...

That's so good of your mum, she sounds like a person who can't show her emotions well but I know she loves you and her grandchildren! I hope Grizzly is OK, pets are such a worry to us aren't they? I'm glad Megan's doing well and her grades are improving. Have a great weekend! Jeannette xx  http://journals.aol.co.uk/jlocorriere05/Welcometomytravels/  

queeniemart said...

Give Grizz a sloppy kiss from me. Enjoy the car ride, LOL.
I am so happy your mom is helping out.....sounds like the two of you have finally came to a place in each of your lives where you realize things that you did not before. Megan is such a good person and has learned a great deal with this. I love sleigh beds, never have had one. It has been pouring down rain like crazy for 24 hrs here...damn basement will flood again! At least it is 65 degrees, no complaints about rain here.
This week has sucked big time at my job. SIGH. I need a vacation.
I love you Chris.

lj

candlejmr said...

Maybe it's a generational type thing but my mom was the same way when I was growing up.  I don't think people from "those days" knew how to show love or affection.  My mom has a bit of money now and she has a tendency to make sure we all (I have 2 sisters and we are all married with families) have things we need...and even just things we want.  My sisters and I decided that's how she shows she loves us....she buys us things.   Sometimes we'd much rather just have a hug or an understanding word or her time.  Sad, but true.  Hey, to each his own I suppose.  At least she's helping Megan!!!!

((hugs))
Jeanne

sugarsweet056 said...

Wishing all the best for Grizzly!!! Give him a slurp from the girls & a hug from me. :)
Nice of your Mother to help.
Hugs, Sug

midwestvintage said...

 Glad Grizzly is feeling better.  Sometimes Mom's and daughters clash, but the love is always there.  Glad she is helping out Megan.

               Julie

dwhee70041 said...

Chris,
Some day I'll talk about my Mom (other than Mother's Day).  She's been dead for 4 years now and I still have not delt with many issues.  Please give Griz a big hug for me....Milo says Woof, Woof!
David

shayshaydc said...

My my Chris..... what we do for our children!!!!!! I understand about the mother situation.... me and my mom were that way for a long time... ith has taken a while for us to develop a relationship and at times it's still a struggle but were working on it.... http://journals.aol.com/shayshaydc/Golfaholic
Sharon:)

siennastarr said...

{{{Chris}}}  I miss you so much.  It seems we never chat anymore, and I really do miss that.  I know you have all your stuff going on, and so do I.. but, I really need to 'talk' to you, one of these days (soon).  I'm glad to hear that Megan is towing the line, and that your mother is mellowing out towards you.  That is nice of her to pay Megan's fines and not expect her to repay it.  Megan made a mistake.. and  hopefully she has learned her lesson.  I know, that you know, if she ever does it again, she would be on her own.  Well, at least I think, that's what you would think!
As for Grizzly?  Bless his heart.. and yours for having to get him down to the vet without help from Joey.  That is so hard, especially when they don't particularly enjoy car rides.. :/   I pray all goes well with his liver tests, etc.
I hope you enjoy your long weekend, Chris.  This is my last one here at the house.  I'm moving out next weekend.  
I have got to do another entry!  I've just been so darn busy!

Love you so much!

Jackie

lanurseprn said...

I'm glad things are going well with Megan.  She'll be ok. Nice of your mom to help with the fees.  Wow what a shock, huh?  I'm glad your mom and you are getting along.  I think it's interesting that someone can give birth to us and we can be so different.  
Hope you have a good weekend. Get your BF to take you out dancing!
Hugs to you...Pam

chat2missie said...

Sounds like things are going well.  Glad to hear it.
Missie

ajquinn354 said...

Hey furniture or not when Megan come home for the summer, keep whtever room you have your Dish connected too, she can sleep in the otehr rooms.   Nice to come to the stage where you realize you and Mom can be caring, loving and still have your own opinion on things and it doesn't have to cause a strain between the two of you isn't it. Life is too short to waste arguing over things, enjoy life. Arlene (AJ)

jckfrstross said...

i would have megan move into your old room. then you don't have to move any where:) have a good weekend

Deb

jeadie05 said...

I am really happy your Mom and you have found each other ,and pleased you and Megan are working this out now ..love Jan xx

penniepooh said...

hi chris ... i`m glad things are going well.  :0)
corey loves max & ermas.
love ya
penny

lisa41076 said...

Chris, I will keep Grizzley in prayers, Hugs Lisa

helloimkara said...

That was really nice of your Mom!!! I hope you have a great weekend Chris!

Kara :)

tendernoggle said...

Mama loves you Chris...and she is there for you....as I know that you will be there for her one day.
love ya,
carlene

princesssaurora said...

I am glad to hear the news about your mom and about Megan!  Things are moving along and working out.  Life, right?  {{{ Chris }}}  It's hard to be a mom and a daughter!  LOL

Did you try the cheese trick with Grizzly to get him to take his pills?

be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

chevyz71gurl74 said...

Those graphics are too cute!
Glad your mom is helping Megan out...
Hope everything goes well for Grizzly at the vet!
It's beautiful here this weekend in Kentucky...near 80!
Have a good one Chris...love ya
Hugs,
Terri

rdautumnsage said...

I'm so sorry to hear Grizzly isn't doing so good these days. I can imagine him being put out without treats. Pickles is something else when she doesn't get her way. I'm sure your Mom helping Megan out with the legal fees is welcomed. I hope Megan realizes how lucky she is she doesn't have to foot the entire bill. As for Mothers......sigh. I couldn't even begin to comment there. I haven't seen mine since I was 16. I do know I have a love/hate relationship with my daughter which seems to improve the more independent she becomes. I think that's because she is beginning to see it's not as easy as it looks. And me? I'm always going to be there for her no matter what. Seems things do improve the older we get, I wonder why that is. (Hugs) Indigo