Thursday, March 30, 2006

A New Day

                  

 

I really want to thank each and everyone of you for all your comments and support yesterday.  It was one of those days where I just wanted to crawl in a hole and hide.  My head was pounding all day, and I felt sick.  I also prayed a lot.

My BF had known this since Jan. and hadn't said a word until he was unusually in a tizzy himself.  I wished, at first, that he hadn't said anything.  Now, I'm sort of glad because I know who the enemy is.  How I will deal with it, I haven't decided yet.

It took every ounce of energy to get myself to work today.  I was curled up in a little ball this morning wishing I could just hide.  I'm not a quitter so I faced my foes.  Quietly.  I haven't said anything yet.  The time will come.

I felt no bitterness yesterday; just crushing disappointment and despair after the anger wore off.  It will be hard to find another job.  I have to stay with the govt because of my health insurance.  OPM has continued Joey on my health insurance past age 22 for at least another two years.  It will then go up for review again.  I could never get another employer to cover him if I left the govt.  Govt. jobs are really scarce now.  When someone leaves, there is no hiring a replacement.  We just suck up the work.  My only hope, right now, is that the VA Hospital has some postings on their internal board.  The govt. website is very slow.  My age is also a drawback.  Although age discrimination is against the law, it is done still.  I will just continue to pray that God will open a door and show me the way.  I also pray that He continues to protect me against the evil things going on and keeps surrounding my own personal aura with love and peace.

My BF is going to work until the end of April.  It is more beneficial for his retirement.  He will use up his sick leave in bits and pieces.  He is a strong person and will be able to do this.  He will walk out with his head held high.

Onward I march, as always.  Joey told me the sewage company came today and had him flush dye down the toilet.  I'm flipping a little bit because some neighbors have had to have line replacements which have cost them a few thousand....eeeeek.  I never sent my line coverage policy in.  It was offered about a month ago.  You have to have it 30 days before it takes effect.  Three years ago it was fine when my plumber checked it but I'm in a bit of a panic.  Of course, Joey would never think to ask if there was a problem.  I'm calling tomorrow to see if it was routine or what.  So, I'm praying big time that there is nothing wrong and then, if not, I'm sending my line protection paperwork in because the pipes are clay and 90 years old.

Hope I haven't missed anybody in my visits.  I know I have.  I will be around to make all my visits tomorrow night.  Love to all and thank you so much for being there.........CHRIS

12 comments:

am4039 said...

well It sounds like a good plan for you BF to leave with his head held high.  Sometimes you have to stay at a job for other reasons like insurance. I know your strong and you will do whatever  you have to do. I'll keep praying.


pennietoonz said...

You`re doing the right thing by thinking this through first.
I hope and pray you don`t have to spend any more money on the house right now (pipes)
Stay strong girl.
Love ya
Penny

jckfrstross said...

I hear ya on having to stay when you need insurance. that is me right now ugh.. but remember God sees all and knows all and he will take care of you:)

Deb

lv2trnscrb said...

(((Chris))) Its so hard to go to work under these conditions. If you go in with the attitude that everyone is loved by the Lord the same, that might help. I have to do that a lot with things; to try to love them as Jesus would. And to treat them like Jesus would even though in our gut we want to hit them and yell at them for the pain they caused us. If you go in with the attitude "I'm working for the Lord" that helps so much, but it is sooo hard. I know you will make the right decision on what to do based on you and your family's needs

betty

queeniemart said...

I am so proud of your maturity and calmness. I need to be more like you. In the end, you will come out the winner....whether you find another job or this jerk at your job gets whats coming. Be proud and hold your head high..you are such a wonderful lady and friend!! Love,lisa jo

tpiez4me said...

((((Chris))))) Keep your head held high ---- something great will come out of all of this!  In order for a door to open one must be closed.
Sharon - http://journals.aol.com/tpiez4me/CoastalComfort

lici0uslatin22 said...

Ohh.. Chris so sorry to hear that you are going trugh this rough time, First off if you decide to leave they will eventually know who they have lost and theres no body else that will replace what you have done and the good work you have put in there, they dont know what they have until it is lost, you need to take it easy and search for a better position meanwhile try not to let your anger out, but if it burst out let it be in a Polite and well manner words, let them feel low and also let them know that you have more power than them,
God sees and trust me they will have theres.....

Take care Mari..

debbiewebb4465 said...

Love the graphic Chris ~ hang in there my friend. There is light at the end of the tunnel ~ sometimes it seems a very long tunnel ~ but you will come out the other side :-) Thinking of you and sending big (((hugs))) across the pond.
Lots of Love ~x Debbie x~

http://journals.aol.com/debbiewebb4465/TheLifeTimesofanEssexGirl

kdcutie26 said...

I am really happy that you are feeling better my darling Chris.  I will pray for your happiness like I always do.  Come to my work in MN.  I will find you a good job.
Love you,
KJ

hadonfield78 said...

I am so sorry about the work situation. My company downsized 2 years ago, and announced they would be shutting my plant down. Now its just a matter of a waiting game. I have 27 years in there........
I have no idea what to do for a job when the plant closes............
My wife works for the Govt too..........
They have lost 3 people in the last year in their office.
NO REPLACEMENTS......
As you said, they all end up doing more.....

chat2missie said...

Sorry about the junk going on at your job!  
Missie

debbted said...

Chris~Sorry I have not visited in a bit...So sorry to hear about the shabby treatment on your job! So true that age discrimaination happens and even more often I find that pleqin old jelaousy happens. Sad, but true. Anyhow glad you are adjusting...do you and BF work for some company? Sure is true about gopvernment jobs being scare. My son is in one he's not too fond of; the catch 22 is when does one get the time and the energy to get a new job when you're in a FT energy-sucking one??? Paraying for you~Deb

http://journals.aol.com/SassyDee50/SassysWORD