Sunday, December 24, 2006

Christmas Eve


It's not the holy night yet but it is approaching.  The best laid plans of mice and men seem to always intervene each year.  I need to focus on just what Christmas means to me.

I was supposed to spend today with my BF, his mother and brother.  Both he and his mother are suffering flu symptoms so it will be next Sunday.  My children are off to Pittsburgh to spend the evening with the in-laws and the longstanding tradition that I have sorely missed over the years since a couple of years after my separation.  They will have a magical time with their cousins and extended family which is very important to me that they continue.  Megan is at Heinz Field as we speak attending the Steeler game.

Yesterday was a rough day for reasons which I won't go into here or now.  I had a bit of a meltdown and will focus on steps to take after the holidays for remedy, if possible.

Many in JLand are dealing with first Christmas' without a dear loved one, injuries, fires in their homes, etc.  Nothing that severe is going on here.

I still need to make a trip to the stores today...I need the good old gift bags which have saved this one here from the need of wrapping.  I am also planning to scout the stores for my annual day after Christmas shopping extravaganza to plot my course of which store to attack first.  I'm thinking it will be Target first, as usual.


Tonight is the night little ones goes to sleep with thoughts of sugarplums dancing in their heads.  LOL..we always had to incorporate Santa into the religious aspect.  Santa was a Christian and delivered gifts as a way to honor baby Jesus.  Ok...that's stretching it a bit but that was my way of dealing with my church's teachings at that time that Santa shouldn't be a part of Christmas.  I still think fantasy is a wonderful part of childhood (even us "big" children).

Some have been asking what my BF is getting me.  In fact, he was lamenting the fact the he is a bit short of cash and wasn't going to be able to get me much.  I needed to remind him that he bought me the 32" JVC flat screen tv and spent hundreds on a new tv stand also in April.  That was my early Christmas gift.

I still haven't heard from my mother about Christmas dinner tomorrow.  She is cooking but it's always when my SIL can make it in accordance to her family's plans.  I need to call and find out what is going on.

I am supposed to go to my mom's this evening.  She lives 45 minutes away.  My problem is the cataract in my right eye has progressed to the point that I can only drive short distances at night.  I can't spend the night there because of Grizzly needing his meds.  I'm really dreading this.  My instincts tell me I may need to cancel this trip for safety's sake.

What I think I miss the most is the huge Christmas celebration that was always held at my old house with both sides of the family.  This continued until my ex bought the old house off of me and I bought this one.  There was a huge feast and tons of Christmas cheer. 

Enough of my laments.....May all find the peace and blessings that surround this evening and Christmas Day no matter what the circumstanes are at this time!

Faith is what has brought me this far and will continue to travel with me into 2007.

Chris  (Thank you, again, Lisa Jo, for sending me this lovely tag!)



jeanno43 said...

I think we all miss Christmas times of long ago.  I know I do.  Large family gatherings, lots of cousins, lots of noise and laughter. As we get older circumstances change, people move away, relationships change, people die.  It is just the way things are.  I think you are sensible not to take chances with your driving. I always keep in my heart the true meaning of Christmas but what would Christmas be without Santa.  Allow the children all the magic they can get, it does not last long and they soon find out how rough life can be.  Merry Christmas my friend

lanurseprn said...

I didn't realize you had a cataract.  Maybe you should consider staying home.  There will be a lot of bad drivers out tonight and you don't want to take any chances.
Like you, I miss the celebrations of past years.  It's different now.  But, that's ok.  It doesn't mean it can't still be nice.
I hope you have a wonderful Christmas.  
Hugs and love to you.......Pam

jeadie05 said...

Dear Chris I hope you have a truly blessed Christmas ,and that Santa brings all the lovliest gifts for you Jan xx

siennastarr said...


I will be home alone tonite too.. so I will be thinking of you, my friend!  I am so glad to  have gotten to know you this year.  You have been such a blessing and good friend to me, and I wish only happiness and all the best that life has to offer you, now, and in the years to come.

Thank you for being my friend...

Merry Christmas

Love you

pippa1116 said...

i will be sitting around tonight too.  this is our first year to do the christmas break exactly like the papers say. but i'll be okay.  i am seeing the advantages of it.

have a wonderful day and Merry Christmas.

lisa41076 said...

Chris, Be careful if you do make the drive to your mom's house this evening, Hugs Lisa

sugarsweet056 said...

Sending you prayers my dear friend. Hoping your Christmas is bright.
Blessings, Sugar

astoriasand said...

It's nice your family are going away for the evening to enjoy a little time with others.I am sorry to read you had a rough dayyesterday Chris.Not to worry love,as you say plenty worse off than us all over the world.We have to think of these when we are even feeling at our lowest.I love the graphic of Santa peeping around the chair it is wonderful.Yes all the little heads will be tucked away waiting for that faithful magical freind of theres delivering whatever in the night..The magic part of Christmas I would never wish to dissapear for any child.I still love it as old as I am.As for your Christmas gift what a wonderful present you got earlier.I should think if your BF is around that alone is a nice gift.I wouldn't risk the driving if your eye is as you say it is.Surely your mum will understand this.I have missed the large Christmas Celebration get togethers too Chris but I am going to my family early morning the first time for yrs I will be waited on for Three whole days Yipee LOL!! Don't care if I only get an orange in my stocking I am seeing them so it will be fantastic.Though I will be a little sad in that I cannot see my son in USA this year.
Take Care Thankyou for your lovely message you sent in my comment and all the other  comments you have taken time out to place in my journal all the graphics you havemade me too..God Bless have a fantastic Blessed Christmas time Catch you New Years Eve Day Take care."MERRY CHRISTMAS"

pharmolo said...

Hope you have a very good Christmas, Chris - safety first, but your decision of course. Good luck in the new year!

tendernoggle said...


chat2missie said...

Merry Christmas Chris to you and your family.

midwestvintage said...

    When I first got married my husbands family had a big Christmas Eve Party every year with around 40 or more relatives.  His Uncle played the piano and we sang songs and had a great feast.  Now 33 year years later it is just us and his mom.  Its so sad.  I couldn't take over the tradition as people moved so far away and most have died.  I am now trying to creat smaller but as meaningful traditions.  Not easy though.   Merry Christmas to you.


my78novata said...

by the way I had my meltdown this week

my78novata said...

yes life is chaing as we get older nad things are chainging I dont know that I like the changes I wish to go back when the girls were little . I dont know waht will happen as they age. I hope we can all make it together. so sad.

jckfrstross said...

Merry Christmas Chris:)  hope you have a great one:)


penniepooh said...

Chris, I hope you and your family have a lovely Christmas.

big hugs xo

imgr8phil said...

Have an extra special and wonderful Christmas!


queeniemart said...

Whatever happened 2 days ago, i pray it is all ok now. When will you get that cataract taken care of?!! I hope that tomorrow is the most special day ever. Lord knows it will probaly be nerve wracking. I hope BF feels better...i love you Chris, so much!

rdautumnsage said...

Hugs, I know just how you feel about the huge ex's extended family get togethers. The only satisfaction I get is my daughter is still, very much a part of it. That and the fact they never really did like his current wife now, and miss me just as much.
But all in all I have a wonderful man now that makes my Christmas just as wonderful, even when it's just me and him. Love Ya Indigo

djohn52 said...

Hi Chris!

Merry Christmas!  I'm sorry you are alone, but I agree you probably should not be out driving after dark.  It was rainy and dreary here in Southern Indiana today so I was expecting my Mom to be grumpy...but bless her heart she did good!  She had cataract surgery too once on each eye at different times.  The one that did the best was when she stayed calm and remember that Do Not go in stressed what ever you have to do!

Yep, you need to throw that ol soda away..far far away.  And drink AgelessXtra.  (I hope that is "legal" to say! I found out my journal was a "third party website" so I had to delete all embedded references to Univera, but I think I can talk about it and have people email me about it.)  Ah see... everyone has life bumps..I've found it's just how I deal with it.  Course AgelessXtra is what Helps me Deal with it!

We're going to have Christmas with our kids later next week.  Christmas day is too hectic for them as it is.  Besides I didn't finish wrapping until late last night.  

Take Care!  Have a Great New Year!
Love and Hugs!

rebuketheworld said...

I dont know why but I do melt downs around the holidays...Its a time to celebrate but reflection always comes too....It just does....its like it goes hand in hand...but I wouldnt change it although, I would love smoothe sailing too...Hope your doing better or whatever it is, we can talk anytime if you want...~Raven