Saturday, January 7, 2006

Disappointment

Disappointments are some of the bitterest pills to swallow....the bigger the disappointment; the harder it is to get a grip on.

This week has been frustrating but frustrations are short-lived and most times easily solved.  Disappointment, on the other hand, will eat you and consume you unless you call upon the Lord to help you accept and release.

I haven't said anything about this because I've learned that many times things do not turn out the way we would like them to.  There was a huge upward mobility promotion at my job.  The last one was in '97 and I was working part time and couldn't apply.  Of course, this time I did. And, for some reason not chosen, although I have the most experience doing the job than the two chosen.  In fact, I have been training the one girl chosen to do the job she was promoted to before this (I didn't get that one either) because she just doesn't know how to navigate the applications. 

OK...nuff said....who knows why some are chosen and some arent.  This would have been a huge financial gain for me and taken me out of the robbing Peter to pay Paul life I lead now.  But....and this is the honest truth...if God had intended for me to have that job, I'd be celebrating right now.  No one can begin to alter the strength of the Lord.

Of course, I'm licking my wounds, tears have fallen, and it's so very, very difficult to watch two others being hugged and celebrating about something I dearly wanted.

Money is not everything.  The new job is totally loaded with stress and very strictly monitorred production levels. My job right now is a job I can handle on my own.  My helper had to take a disability retirement.  I accept many new challenges that are above my grade level because it makes the day go faster but I have a pace established and work on my own. Plus, my supervisor is very liberal about my using my vacation time when emergencies arise. My conclusion is that the stress at this point in my life of the new job  may have been far too much.  These were thoughts that were going through my mind before the announcements were made yesterday.

My BF, God Bless him, was still ill last night but decided I needed to get out and refocus, which I've done.  He works with me and said that this is management's stupidity (maybe); not mine.  I was just feeling like such a loser.  So, now that all is said and done, I hugged and congratulated the two that got promoted and held my head high.  Two guys totally flipped and left for the day.  Life moves on.  I still have a job that provides, much love in my life, and dear friends in J-Land who provide so much support and encouragement.  HUGS and LOVE to all of you!!!!!!!!   CHRIS

7 comments:

jckfrstross said...

sorry you did not get the promotion but you are right god does know what he is doing he closes one door and opens another (((((((((Chris))))))))))))))

Deb

shayshaydc said...

We never know what God has planned....we cannot see the big picture but he can!!! Sorry about the job but maybe a better one will come along!!! We will pray for that to happen!!!! Love you Chris!!!! http://journals.aol.com/shayshaydc/Golfaholic
Sharon:)

chat2missie said...

I'm sorry that you were passed up for the job.  That stinks!!  Maybe your meant to do something better!!  
Missie

lv2trnscrb said...

Chris, you walked away a winner; you were able to congratulate and hug them. I'm sure that was so hard to do. But that just shows what an incrediby strong woman you are. The Lord knows what is the best for us. We just need to keep trusting in Him.

Hugs to you!

betty

bignewmanut said...

I feel ya Chris, the guy I went out with Saturday I trained and now he makes twice what I do, has a house on the lake, and has more things fall into his lap than I could ever imagine. But like you I just believe there is a nother purpose for me yet to be discovered, or its here and I'm just not seeing it yet. Stay strong,
Jeff

pennietoonz said...

Hi Chris... You are getting good with those graphics!
I`m sorry about the disappointment with your job. Who knows, maybe you`re right....and it is a blessing in disguise that you didn`t get such a stressful position, when it sounds like you are pretty comfortable with what you are doing now. Even so, I understand the hurt and disappointment that you feel. I`m sorry. It takes a big person to hold their head up high and congratulate the others anyhow. I would not have expected anything less from you, my dear.
Hugs to you and God bless,
Penny
http://journals.aol.com/pennietoonz/PennysPlace

xxroxymamaxx said...

God NEVER gives us more than we can handle....and maybe He didn't think you could right now.  Your still the best to us!  GBU, Shelly