Today

Today was a good day in that Joey has bounced back very well.  We were able to discuss just what was bothering him yesterday.  His spirits are 100% improved today and tomorrow is his doctor's appointment so all else is manageable.

At least I'm working on manageable.  Work was super hard for me today.  This last loss of promotion has stung me far harder than the others.  I'm not sure why but I'm having a terrible time ridding myself of anger and bitterness.  I've never been bitter; usually disappointed and then it's gone.  I pray for this to leave.  It is only hurting me not to let it go.

It's so hard to realize that there are those who don't acknowledge or appreciate the fact that I have taken on far more than I had to willingly.  I almost hit a shutdown stage today which is not in my character one bit.  Many came to almost lend condolensces to me which made the tears flow again.  I'm going in a half day tomorrow.  Joey is picking me up for the doctor's appointment.  I'm swamped and had a special project to do today.

Lord, please help me through this.  Help me cleanse my soul of the anger and bitterness that just won't seem to leave.  Let me come to the realization that this is all part of Your plan.  You will always provide for me and my children; You always have. Thank you for holding Joey in your hands and bringing him peace.  In Jesus Name...Amen.

So, I'm late with my journals tonight.  I've been throwing myself into PSP because I find it relaxing (when I'm not pulling my hair out of frustration from it but that's getting less and less....that is, until I tackle animation and glitter.)

Take Care all...hopefully, within a day or two, I will be able to go to work and not be screaming inside my head........CHRIS