Monday, October 10, 2005

Journal Hopping Etc.

I suppose the early phases of blogging and journals is an investigative process.  I can relate to so many.  I would suppose it's because of my age and the fact that I've survived five decades.  I can relate to the different stages of life that females pass through and the fears, worries and heartbreaks; along with the great joy.

Now that I'm 50...well, not exactly...I'll be 52 on Nov. 9th, I've reached sort of a plateau of content.  I don't beat myself over the head with a club anymore...why do it?  There are so many others out there who are chomping at the bit to do it for you.

Many years ago, I suffered from clinical depression.  What a nightmare!   But I am living proof that no one needs to suffer from it forever.  Anti-depressants are a God send but there is also an element of self will to keep clawing your way out of the black hole.  How many times I neared the top to fall halfway down again.  The positive note is that once I made it out of the hole, I rarely fell back in.  If I did, it was never that deep.

I passed that "nasty" gene on to my son.  He was 12 when it hit.  He is now 22 and been in remission for four years.  What fortitude he had to keep clawing.

Well, I guess I sort of got off topic from my original title.  My point, though, is that so many of us suffer from many of the same joys, heartbreaks, experiences.  We all have things in our life that we have to claw our way through.  From the reading of several journals so far, that is becoming even more apparent to me.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Journal Hopping is how I just found your journal :o)
There are so many different levels at which people are writing about in their little corner of Internet Land, I just float around reading about what others are thinking about or up to in their stage of life. I think it's a wealth of wisdom to be found!
Rebecca

Anonymous said...

Depressions is something some many suffer from, we are not alone, I hope that you don't blame yourself for something that you can not control (has in your son's case). My mother is Bi-Polar and believe me I fear everytime I get depressed. But like you I crawl myself out, and sometimes someone helps me out. ~j~

Anonymous said...

Oh Lord, I've had my days of depression! I still suffer from it but I suffer from PMS extremely bad. Actually, I think I'm pretty much over the depression, God knows I took enough antidepressants for it. I'm not taking anything now, but when the monthly PMS comes I seem to turn into a different person. My kids even know the very day I start! Simply because I'm no longer bitching and I'm a MUCH better person. Sad, huh? I need medication for it but I don't think there is none for it.
I hope your Son stays in remission. I'll be back...again! LOL! *kendra*

Anonymous said...

funny, journal hopping is how I found yours.  And let me just say that this entry was one I really needed to read.  THANKS.  I was been clawing my way thru the last couple of years.  I am trying to decide if its just the craziness of raising three small girls or if it is really a dead end relationship.  I am the definition of insanity these days...  
anyway, I will be back for more but for now I am going to read some older entries in your journal.  I have a feeling you are ganna be filled with wise words for me to ponder.
Missy