Wednesday, November 2, 2005

Sound Familiar?

lol...hate to admit it but all 20 have applied to me at one time or another...

 WHEN GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH........... 
 
1. WE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHERE OUR PURSE IS. 
2. WE BELIEVE THAT DANCING WITH OUR ARMS OVERHEAD AND WIGGLING OUR BUTT  WHILE YELLING "WOO-HOO!" IS TRULY THE SEXIEST DANCE MOVE AROUND.
3. WE'VE SUDDENLY DECIDED THAT WE WANT TO KICK SOMEONE'S BUTT AND HONESTLY BELIEVE WE COULD DO IT TOO.
4. IN OUR LAST TRIP TO PEE, WE REALIZE THAT WE NOW LOOK MORE LIKE A HOMELESS HOOKER THAN THE GODDESS WE WERE JUST FOUR HOURS AGO.
5. WE DROP OUR 3:00 A.M. SUBMARINE SANDWICH ON THE FLOOR WHICH WE'RE EATING EVEN THOUGH WE ARE NOT THE LEAST BIT HUNGRY), PICK IT UP AND  CARRY ON EATING IT 
6. WE START CRYING AND TELLING EVERYONE WE SEE THAT WE LOVE THEM SOOOOO MUCH.
7. WE GET EXTREMELY EXCITED AND JUMP UP AND DOWN EVERY TIME A NEW SONG PLAYS BECAUSE "OH MY GOD! I LOVE THIS SONG!" 
8. WE'VE FOUND A DEEPER/SPIRITUAL SIDE TO THE GEEK SITTING NEXT TO US
9. THE MAN WE'RE FLIRTING WITH USED TO BE OUR 5TH GRADE TEACHER.
10. THE URGE TO TAKE OFF ARTICLES OF CLOTHING, STAND ON A TABLE AND SING OR DANCE BECOMES STRANGELY OVERWHELMING TO US. 
11. OUR EYES JUST DON'T SEEM TO WANT TO STAY OPEN ON THEIR OWN SO WE KEEP THEM HALF CLOSED AND THINK IT LOOKS EXOTICALLY SEXY. 
12. WE'VE SUDDENLY TAKEN UP SMOKING AND BECOME REALLY GOOD AT IT.
13. WE YELL AT THE BARTENDER, WHO WE BELIEVE CHEATED US BY GIVING US JUST LEMONADE, BUT THAT'S JUST BECAUSE WE CAN NO LONGER TASTE THE GIN.
14. WE THINK WE ARE IN BED, BUT OUR PILLOW FEELS STRANGELY LIKE THE KITCHEN FLOOR (er, or, the mop?)
15. WE START EVERY CONVERSATION WITH A BOOMING, "DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY BUT..." 
16. WE FAIL TO NOTICE THAT THE TOILET LID'S DOWN WHEN WE SIT ON IT. 
17. OUR HUGS BEGIN TO RESEMBLE WRESTLING TAKE-DOWN MOVES. 
18. WE ARE TIRED SO WE JUST SIT ON THE FLOOR (WHEREVER WE HAPPEN TO BE STANDING) AND TAKE A QUICK NAP. 
19. WE BEGIN LEAVING THE BUTTONS OPEN ON OUR BUTTON FLY PANTS TO CUT DOWN ON THE TIME WE''RE IN THE BATHROOM AWAY FROM OUR DRINK. 
20. WE TAKE OUR SHOES OFF BECAUSE WE BELIEVE IT'S THEIR FAULT THAT WE'RE HAVING PROBLEMS WALKING STRAIGHT.
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LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE OF IT...KIND OF LIKE PLAYDOUGH.....

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

yep been there too!!! wanna go back again just one more time

Anonymous said...

Oh my, but yes, I've been there too.  My sub sandwich was more likely an order of nachos or tacos.
S-

Anonymous said...

I'm not touching this one with a ten foot pole!

Anonymous said...

Lmao....  Dem been there done that.... what about having difficulties accepting that we dont remember what happend that day but say we do remeber everything haha...  (I do that)...  Mari

Anonymous said...

LMAO....wow...I've been there....I learned my lesson though when I passed out behind my favorite diner and a cop drove by. I still wish I could thank the guy that was walking to his car when the cop drove by. I feel if it wasn't for him walking by when he did I would of spent the night in jail for intoxication....lol

~Tina

Anonymous said...

I couldn't believe when I read these, it is so much like my friend Jennifer and I.  Wow.  LMAO.  I will have to show her these...thanks Chris.
Katie

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha  thanks for the laugh! That was great.
~Penny
http://journals.aol.com/pennietoonz/PennysPlace